I guess from the title you can already tell this is gonna be a bitchy rant letter but I guess reading nonsense is a way to relax a lil in the middle of a boring work day (at least it works for me) so bleh I'm gonna rant awayyyy.
Haha so what did your ma and pa say about your sis's beau. Damn this is fast, but not too far considering I am and you'll soon be in your twenties lol. I met up with my friend's group of friends from Purdue (2 hours drive from Chicago, wherever that is) for dinner on friday. Most of them are or around the same age with my friend who's a senior and newly grad, and one of the girls graduated one year prior and just got married couple months ago. This whole group of people are all from Hong Kong, which felt pretty bizarre but in a nice way the night we had dinner, because it's just so rare to have this whole local-ish Hongkongese vibe around in such a long time. Felt kind of funny, can't say I don't miss speaking in full Canto for just a couple hours with people fully understanding what words like 'kai' and 'hea' is without the need to explain to them. So anyway, back to relationships. I wonder if you will get married soon after you graduate haha, 'cause the more I think about it the more I can see it happen lol but don't let my bullshits like these burden you or anything haha this is just a random thought. Lol the hipster bit. I kind of like it seeing your sis is not going for the typical guy-in-a-suit lol Kinda nice to switch it up a lil ey? And I can't say I'm not biased to hipsters anyway so lol
Yessssss you and your bearded-manwhore should definitely come to Chicago (if you are not already tired of it) and maybe even for more than just a weekend! So I can steal you from him (or well, claim) for a night or so :p Couples couples. All is well and will be well when you see him again *emoji relief face* I guess seeing couples on the street doesn't bother me anymore. But on the other hand living with one definitely does Ugh. I guess it's nice that I have studio classes everyday 9-430. Otherwise I'll spend a lot more time at home with the couple that's getting into my nerves. The class I'm currently taking is about neon lights. Sounds cool ey? So cool that people dropped out after the first two days for reasons like 1-not expecting it to be such technical and crafty and 2-allegic reactions to certain materials. Eitherway, there's only 7 of us left in the class now with one of the ABT(aiwan) from UW Madison. Surprisingly enough apparently their fine art program is pretty strong too, and they have a ton of gallery space with students running them really well. Maybe one day I'll go there for exhibitions or something. Funny how WI no longer messes with my head anymore although I still think of him every single time I see Wisconsin/Madison being brought up. I guess memories are a souvenir from our past and feelings.
So. Rants. Phew. There's a lot. How do I start.
Okay so 2 bitches are currently bugging me a ton right now. Gonna start of with the easier one first. So. I'm not sure how much you know/remember about a particular really annoying Korean girl. But she's one of the few friends that stayed in Chicago for the summer too. To summarize, she's a diva. The world is always "super mean" and "super rude" to her and everyone should apologize. Gosh get over yourself. Normally when she's complaining about her life I'm already a bit annoyed, 'cause she's just the kind of people that takes things way too personally. Like if there's this guy who walked in front of her and didn't hold the door for her too, he's rude. Okay come on let's face it, it'd be nice if he does hold the door for her but it's not like he's RUDE if he doesn't kay? But hell to the yes and she will make a BIG fuss about things like this. Ugh. And I know she rant to me seeking bitchy comments on that too to justify her ng-gur-ness but sorry not sorry I just can't give her that for situations like these I don't wanna betray my own voice too much and be a puppet and agree to those 'cause I don't and honestly she's just such a diva. She's just the kind of girl who complains about everything and she can be a really supportive friend at times, but other times she just don't give a shit and things you do just will never be as good as hers and your choices and tastes are always wrong if it's not on the same line with her. Yes, you might ask why am I still friends with her. I don't know because I fucking stayed away from her after first semester when we no longer share 3 classes together. Then we distanced ourselves a lil and one day she told me the reason she got so much quieter in second semester was because of her depression and eating disorder and that she tried to kill herself (I can sense the problem too 'cause when she was *sick* she wasn't a diva, and duh, yes that's very obvious, and tbh now that I think about it I liked her better when she was that way but of course I won't wish diseases/pain/sorrow on her). Anyway then we started hanging out more again because I felt like it mustn't be easy to open up about things like these to people and it's not like you're gonna run around and tell just everyone (or someone can, idk and idc.) Anyway then it's the end of school year and being one of the rare people and friends tagging around it was natural that we hung out a lot more. She takes classes 3 mornings a week over the 6 weeks period, while I do daily afternoons in the first 3 weeks and daily full schedules on the last 3. It was fine for the amount of time we hang out in the first three weeks, when some of her friends are still around and I'm not that tired after liberal art class and I still get lots of alone time if I want to after class because it was relatively chill. But this class (not complaining but) is just so tiring. I did not expect this, and I'm pretty sure the satisfaction of final product (having a god damn neon sign for myself) will be pretty rewarding but it's honestly just a really hard course and for some reason, pretty draining. We basically spend all day working with fires that resemble two or more bunsen burner in ovary shape and burn glass tubes and try not to break it while bending it and doing shits with it. In one sentence, it's all standing in no ac-room (fire and temperature for materials and safety and shit, but it's in a basement and there's tens of fires burning in the room) and work all day. Maybe it's the heat in combination with the extreme focus required on handling those glasses, it's just very draining and usually by the end of the day I really feel like I have no energy to do anything not even to cook a noodle (that requires more standing while waiting for the boil lol). So yea anyway, being the personal-time-needy person I am and facing the diva-girl she is, I can't be seeing her everyday already anyway, and now on top of the energy draining course and her extreme boredom this is just hell. Idek what I'm trying to say here. Urghhhhhh. Okay I know I'm really 1999 here but there's one good thing about her, which is she will say what she's feeling when she's feeling it. Which is also part of why she's such a diva but good at times when you're trying to be the comforting friend. But gosh she's so easily offended and she will go like "I haven't receive your apology yet". Who are you the queen? Dafaq. Like she will be saying "I'm still really upset about it" and then when can we meet up and such. So I was like what about tomorrow dinner? And she was like asking if I'm free tonight. So I told her the truth and said "Yeah but I have groceries stacking from last week that I wanna finish up tonight". Then she was like "eat dinner tonight for apology". Well fuck you! You don't feel like dealing with whatever you think is a huge apocalypse-ish problem and I don't feel like dealing with your UPSETness and your diva-estique too
And yay! Now she will be the one who's mad and I'll be the bitch. Of course it is, of course I am -_- But your highness while I have sympathy over your boredom I myself am the only one who will be sympathizing my lost precious personal time too. How about nah.
Side note. I know I have the very bad habit of setting people off (rare on close friends or rare nowadays in general lol) But is it just me or is it normal to assume that, if you propose a meet up on the day like immediately, and if the other party don't respond or say anything confirming it, isn't it safe to assume that THAT IS NOT HAPPENING? .....idk. Let me know. Maybe I was living less social norms that I thought I am...................
Phew. Rant on bitch 1. I feel like I'm talking-to-myself-ish in the way I rant this time that I don't even bother to chill a lil but BLEH. K I'll lighten up the mood for a lil. Lol. From dinner with my friends the other night. There was this guy who's pretty cute and tbh the only non-toxichkjj there. Anyways, he's pretty funny and tall and stuffs. We were having Korean food that night and he was like saying no to every dish with green. Then the girl next to him, opposite to me, was asking me like don't everyone eat green. And I was like of course! But that's only bcs I have to shit, otherwise I won't be eating it either. And he was like proud and saying like "See, green just sucks and no one likes it if they don't have to". Then I was like hellyes. But how do you shit if you don't eat green and we got into another whole discussion about the annoyingness of fruits and how banana (as he claims) is the most convenient fruit to eat. Bleh anyway. So after dinner, me and my friend, and the only other girl (newly wed whom I just met) was walking towards the train station/home together while the other 6 guys were all from Purdue and were all gonna drive back at the spot to Indiana (yes just googled, that's where it is). And immediately after the guys left the girls asked me what did I thought (one asked on the way back and the other asked after she got home) and I was like I didn't realize that was like a blind/speed dating kind of thing lol. Then the friend I went with kept saying how the nogreens-guy was the only normal guy there and such and such. I didn't say anything back to either of them but yeahhhhhhh righhhhhhhht he's pretty cute. Looks a bit like the AF who lives in the same building as you in HK though, which is weird....lol Anyway. Then ytd there was some other fuss about those two girls that one of them thought my friend got pissed abt her 'cause she was quiet on the way back while she and me kept chatting almost the whole way (which was not the case, it was just period exhaustion --) And so when my friend call me ytd while me and the period-one was at my home we were like asking abt it 'cause she's the one who ask my friend if she's pissed abt the other girl (let's hope you aren't confused lol) and blablablah I thought my friend's gonna say something but she ended wanting to pretend not be here so I just played along and ask ard for stuffs she was texting me next to me about (-_- lol). And during that I found out the nogreensguy had a crush on my friend next to me, which is funny and suddenly all make sense because she kept saying that guy's really good and stuffs. This friend of mine is in a LDR though, with her bf in London. Doesn't seem to stop her from nonstop texting that guy but lol ohwell I see why she kept selling him to me now hahhahaa. She does laugh at all his texts though qwertqwert (MUAHAHAHA longtimenosee)
Okay anyway. Onto bitch #2. Bitch whom I'm literally learning to live with. Forgot how much I told you or perhaps none I really can't remember but anyways so to refresh memories her dad was in town last sunday to friday, which I've known for months. What I didn't know was that her dad is gonna stay with us. All along I knew her dad is coming and I know he will be visiting our apartment, which is why her boyfriend/summer-stand-in-roommate had to move out during the time he's in town. What I didn't know was that her dad is gonna come live with us, not just for one or two days too either, but the whole week, and guess what, she did not tell me about this. Not until after she picked her dad up at the airport and sent me a text saying "picked up my dad *victory hand sign* and I was like oh cool. And suddenly rmbed and asked sounding as not alerted as possible if he's staying in the hotel or with us. And she replied with a sure tone with us and I was like shit uh-oh. Replay on that day I went up seeing my absent roommate's mattress in the living room I was like confused and having bad juju feeling but damn. Like isn't it safe to assume he's going to live in the hotel if they mentioned and asked me if I know about any good hotels in Chicago before? Even if not, shouldn't you at least have the decency to give me a heads up if your dad is gonna come stay with us. Like you know to ask for permission to have your boyfriend stay over here it's not too much to ask and expect the same when your dad is gonna come stay over? It's not like I will say no when you ask but honestly it's really uncomfortable. Imagine being in my shoe, that's basically having a random mid-age man coming to stay at my home. Is it too much to expect some respect on this. Honestly I'd be more comfortable having your ons/random hookup here than having your dad dropped in from the sky with no ground to say no. Anyway. I was gonna talk to her about it (since she's the one who ask for a heads up even when just having friends over, which didn't seem to imply on herself that I found out while talking to this Chinese girl the other day and she said "huh I thought you went back to Hong Kong 'cause the last few times I went to your home I didn't know you were there". And nope I did not say anything about that.), back to the sentence, I was gonna talk to her about it but her dad is always here so I thought it won't be a nice time to talk to her now with the guest present so I was gonna wait till her dad is gone to talk to her but that still haven't happen okay nvm. That got me kinda really pissed but it's not until this thing that I really have to rant it out.
She's the name on our electricity bill because I lost my debit card and my passport is on hold when I was gonna register for it (which btw I have no idea why should I be dealing with all rent, wifi, insurance, sewage, and every damn thing either). So awhile ago she got the electricity bill for this month and she was basically complaining how it got a lot pricier than the month we move in while indicating I switch on the aircon for way too much (which I know and am sorry about too and I mean it but I just feel heat too easily as oppose to her feeling cold all the time and honestly way too often and yes fyi she's the kind of girl who always get headaches and was wearing long sleeves in early october while I was still in tanks. It's not anyone's fault or anything. We just have different body structures, or as the way I see it.) So when I got the rent bill for the coming month and saw the lil tips session at the back of the statement saying generally fridge takes up 20% of household electricity bill and suggest on turning the temperature of that down, I thought of her complaining about the bill. So a couple days ago, I discovered a lil issue with our fridge which is when we close the fridge door even with the slightest power, the freezer door will pop out, hence it will always be running the motor like hell trying to produce enough energy to keep the food cold hence spending more electricity, right? So I wrote a note saying lets keep that freezer door close explaining what I just typed couple lines ago and put it on the fridge door with moloi emoji face so we can all see and remember 'cause I think that's a huge part of why our bill went up (with that door never fully shut). All out of good intentions. Then while she's being the bitch she is with the whole mess of her dad living here which I still haven't TALK TO HER about, I thought I shouldn't be a bitch just because she is one. So while i can totally not do this i still did ‘notify’ her my friend's coming back with me after grocery run to chill (LIKE SHE ASKED. FOR HEADSUPS). And when i open the door she immediately banged her door shut (which i understand for privacy, but was just rude. okay nvm). Then i saw two fresh notes around the house. Note #1 on the floor near living room and another on the door. Ugh ill just send you two pics of those notes cbf to type them out but it was just so passive aggressive and I felt like I did my note because of what you said and I was just trying to cope with what you said and felt like thats a good idea but the way she did hers was just so passive aggressive or idk if im just too sensitive while reading it you be the judge but that just got me so pissed.
Argh I really just wanna air those negative energies out but I don't know how and it's not like I have energy after class anymore to do anything else to put it off (sounds like an excuse but is actually true and besides I'm broke anyway). Okay let's see. Boxers. Hahahaha yes that is really conflicting and I'm still really conflicted while feeling this is gonna be a recurring problem. Half sleeping tgt with two twin mattress aligned and lol no cuddles, just him getting maybe a bit too close to my pillow sometimes after he's asleep while nocturnal me don't fall deep into sleep as early as he does and sometimes join the living room gang later after websurfing in my room for a bit. Ever getting together with him just sounds like a parallel universe lol Not that I want to or not want to, but yea anyway. I'm happy the way things are right now. It's just this conflicting voice in me everytime I spend too much time with him is just getting confusing and conflicting and is recurring and every one is telling me (okay not every one but people who knows like mk and our friend in Aus).
John John John. Lots of feelings but not much to put in words. He's always gonna be representing something to me. Prolly something so deep and philosophical though that my vocab-lacking brain isn't able to comprehend. But oh John. John oh John.
Hahaha have I told you I got dragged to psychic reading couple weeks ago (yes Korean diva girl). Anyway out of the many things she said and about some more recent-related ones, I should enjoy my summer and I should kiss around and flirt around but she was like don't have sex! Just kiss around. Which I can't help but half-giggled-laughed at the time. But it's nice to keep that spirit or having the mind thinking I too am still able to have fun and such being the way I am. Sigh idk.
Miss you so much I'm finally starting to miss Hong Kong. Finally. I'm pretty sure those two bitches #1 & #2 definitely speeded this up and pushed me to missing the familiars and the lovings but sigh. Can't wait to have my other roommate back either. The suicidal but cute and way more mature roommate. Sigh. She's having a hard time too but another time another story I'm already ranting too much.
Funny how we barely skyped this semester but hopefully my passport thing will work out fine and I will be coming back to see your fine ass soon. Have fun at work an update me in my pissable life haha. Btw almost done with Sense8, have you started?
Love,
PS. I'm one annoying soul;
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